Christine As many of you know, I am a therapist first, but serve as a Relationship Coach as well.I have had hundreds of people come to my office over the years wanting help in getting a great relationship.When I see inconsistency I think, “Oh no is this another person who is emotionally unavailable?” Are they preoccupied with their independence, are they afraid to look too attached so they let days go by without contact?Due to previous, unsuccessful attempts to find solid relationships and a lot of hurt feelings, there is a great deal of insecurity felt when someone decides to get “back on the horse” and try again.There are three primary dynamics that impact your feelings of security in the early dating stages.Understandably, people have lost faith in their ability to choose wisely in the first place, as well as believing that there is really anyone out there for them.
However, if the person is unable or unwilling to do something about it, you must make the decision to move on.
I explain that I have never done well with inconsistency either.
I am much happier if I know when I will see you next, so I can look forward to it and put it out of my mind to get on with my day.
Are you doing all the work to get to keep seeing each other.
Does he/she call you to initiate plans for when you will see each other next?